(Moved from my old blog)
Years ago, when I was still in college and worried about my chosen course, I wrote an article entitled “Why can’t it be both?”. I wondered if the career that I wanted to pursue would feed my family.
I said that when I earn enough from the job that I love, I would change the title into “It can be both”.
After numerous work experiences in various TV networks and private production companies, I managed to get by. I became financially independent and even helped my parents send my siblings to school. I am not rich, yet. But I’ll be, soon! I claim it!
Below is the piece I wrote in my earlier blog last September 19, 2010.
There are many things that disheartened me these past few days. First, my thesis proposal failed. I have to not just revise it but start all over again in a week. But that doesn’t pressure me. I don’t know if it’s something good. I must do it whether I like it or not. And doing something just for the sake of accomplishing it is a disaster.
I’m supposed to start preparing for my thesis proposal presentation tonight but I chose to write my thoughts about some things. It’s not about my thesis. It’s about my other class this semester -BC 134 (Public Affairs Program).
The MMK Episode tonight (Grandparents Day Special) reminded me of so many things. I admit that I am very emotional when talking about family because they are the closest to me and my most precious treasures. As expected, I cried. I can relate to it as a daughter and a granddaughter. If you watched the MMK tonight, you knew why.
It also reminded me of the story I am researching for my pair, Jhayvee. It’s about an abandoned grandfather in Lawton. He has five children yet none of them adopt their father in their own homes. Maybe that’s why when asked if he wanted to be placed in a home for the elderly, he didn’t think twice. He said YES.
I was inspired to settle all papers needed as soon as possible to help him. It is not an easy task. From then on, I always come home late and tired. My father starts to suspect my wanderings so I have to explain everything I do each time. He’s my complaints’ listener. I know how he feels about the things that occupy much of my time. He scolds me as an expression of his concern about my health, work and my thesis. He even volunteered to disguise as a resident near the creek because I told him that I still have no case study, which is my another problem aside from my pair’s story. But no matter how it will take away my burden, I refused. I told him that it’s not a problem. It’s a challenge that needs to be solved by sweat and blood.
While researching, writing and shooting the story, I am learning new things about the society and about myself. Happiness can be derived not just from grades and material things the world can offer, but more on things that count after graduation and even after we all live our lives.
My course gives me a divided feeling – sad because it’s uncertain if I can give the best lives I promised to my family since I was young given the low salary for the work I want to pursue and happy because this is an enduring chance for a more noble cause. But both aspirations can be possible and I still cross my fingers to it. When that moment comes, I will read this again, highlight the most hopeful sentence here and entitle this as “It can be both”.